Wednesday, February 06, 2008

Why I Won't Eat Chocolate Skittles

I was at Wal-Mart getting some groceries the other day when I was standing in the checkout line reading titles like "Jesus Found Frozen With Al Capone and Two-Headed Alien!" and "Loose Ninety Pounds in a Week!" and "Mother Eats Baby and Then Herself!" and became bored so I wanted to check out the candy because I looove candy. What I saw next will haunt me for life. There, on the shelf, were chocolate Skittles. Yes, chocolate. Skittles. What? I mean, Skittles are some of my favorite candy and I enjoy the simple pleasures it brings my mouth. You have your five basic flavors: green, purple, yellow, orange, and red. Your five basic colors: lime, grape, lemon, orange, and red. I mean, that is it. I only like the original Skittles, by the way. The groovy colors and the sour ones do nothing for me. But I digress.

These new Skittles have flavors like brownie, and fudge, and chocolate and even brown. Brown is not a flavor! It is a color! The Skittles just look disgusting, and I will not try them. Ever. You cannot make me. If I want brownines, then I will get them out of a box. I don't need them in candy form. If I wanted fudge I would get my grandmother to make it and send it to me. If I wanted brown I would work for UPS.

So, in short, I am boycotting all Skittles. As much as it pains me to say it, it is true. No more. I think I am going to stick with Twizzler's, Starburts, and Sour Patch Kids.

Yes, kids, it is true. Yours truly, Jordan Williams, has gotten a tattoo. It is only two years in the making, believe it or not. I wanted something that means something special to me-the two loves in my life: Jesus, and Jacob. The tattoo is a heart with a cross through it. The heart is not complete because it will only be complete again when I see him in Heaven. The cross has a hook on the end because no matter what, Jesus has me. I am hooked to Him, forever. On the cross is a nail, to serve as a reminder of why I am hooked and all that Jesus has done for me. Also, the cross is based off of the necklace that I wear. It was once Jacob's, and I gave it to him right before he died.

I'm not sure if the tattoo is complete, yet. I wanted to put Jacob's name is Hebrew on the cross, but the tattoo would have to have been bigger. Maybe one day I will get his name put on there, but not now.

This was truly a spur of the moment decision. I went into the tattoo shop to pierce the cartilage on my ear, and came out with a tattoo. Crazy. I do not regret it though. Maybe one day I will, but for now, I am happy. Now, I have to tell the parents...